alchemia: (Default)
Was at Jewel (grocery) the other day. The total shopping bill came to over $300, so I didn't notice immediately that there was an error... the cashier ( a woman, this is relevant...) actually noticed it, and apologised that she forgot to enter my sticker-collection booklet to make the frying pans I got free instead of beign charged I don't know $50 or whatever they were otherwise. So I had to take the receipt to the customer service desk to get that refunded. The whole time I was in an OK mood. Accidents happen and I was glad she caught it for me instead of finding out later.

At the service desk, the manager was there and asked what I need. I explained the situation, keep in mind, I'm still in a good mood, I'm not an angry customer. The manager, hearing the problem responds Thus:

cut for mention of physical violence )

I don't think that was a very good response, but i was still shocked and since the next person in line was ready to push their way forward- I fell back on variation of an often used line when casheirs etc make some error and and you can tell they're expecting to be screamed at for it. Normally, my first instinct would have been to go find the manager and report that. But, obviously, in that store, it would no good, he'd probably congratulate the offender. And in this case it was the manager, so who do you ask to talk to as the next higher-up then?

So one, I need to figure out if / how the manager can be reported to anyone and

two, I need to get some easily modifiable lines to have at the ready if something like that happens again.

Suggestions for replies???
alchemia: (Default)
This post: I find upsetting. I agree with the general premise that those in a position of power/privilege should use that power/privilege to do good whenever they can, especially when its not the popular thing to do. I even agree with the bit about how there really isn't any place for someone to be offended when they are told they share a position of privileged with those who are doing these terrible things.

What bothers me about the post is the simplification of the problem down to gender binarism, and through that, the abdication of women's strength. I've seen too many people harmed by other people- in all different combination of the sex/gender of the involved parties- to feel I could assume safety/risk based on sex/gender alone. And yet, almost everyone does, resulting in people in same-sex relationships, trans-folk and men under reporting their abuse, not being believed when they do, or being arrested for being victims.

Sometimes, standing up for the victim isn't just a risk of being called names ("fag" or "pussy" as [personal profile] cereta gave for examples). For some, going against institutionalised rape results in being beaten and murdered because it proves they are a "traitor" (be that to heteronormitivity, or to the faction holding the gun to their head and giving the order to commit the heinous act).

I'm not questioning that male privilege exists; I'm questioning making rape a gender-binary issue of male-privilege/power verses lack there of. I do think it comes down to an issue of misogyny; misogyny reinforces all kinds of other privileges- cis-sexual/cis-gender privileges, straight privilege, some class etc privileges and all the -phobias/-isms that go with these (homophobia, transphobia, etc). I'm not sure how to sum this up in neat phrasing to address those with privilege about taking responsibility, but I think it needs to be done to really address the issue.


alchemia: (Default)

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