alchemia: (Default)

oh man, this makes me sad... not getting a negative review, but the 'cause' for it.  What are they failing to teach kids in school these days?  They're complaining about not understanding stuff  learned in effing junior high!

forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php

its a pastiche... in the style of ancient mesopotamian stories.  You don't have to like the style, but thats completely seperate from if the authour managed to replicate the style effectively or not  (eg: 1/5 because i dont like the style, but 4/5 for execution and adherance to original style) There is TON of repetition and their own style of prose/poetry, not to mention that  lacuna or missing fragments is a common (and honest) fearure of translations from such long dead languages ... and as a computer programmer i know that sometimes disks/drives can be damaged in such a way that bits are missing here and there.  Recovering data, from damaged disks or ancient cuniform tablets is no easy feat, and just getting some of it, enough to understand it, despite the lacuna, is a great achievement.

  • but its too hard to read because it was too stylistic and bad at it .
  • but the author failed to 'recover' the lost fic because of all thé missing parts.
  • the lacuna makes it a 'WIP' 
  • they just threw together ideas with no direction (i fucking followed the gilgamesh plot near-exactly, starting from the scorpian scene)
  • i havent read it, but don't rec it. (my favourite kind of review!).

FFS, try reading the source text, Gardner's Gilgamesh being a decent one for the unitiated i think, and which i used as a refrence for writing, along with a collected book on stories from the setting and Ishtar ones, but googlimg 'gilgamesh + text' will pop up some older versions, some which try to fill in or skip the lacuna, others use '........' to indicate lacuna etc, and some try to modernise the style, but as i was writing for someone with interest in the subject, i went with what was the closer imho reading.  Anyway, if you get Gardner's book, note the style, note the lacuna, note the footnotes about the discovery, translation and words that no one agrees the meaning for...(Dead language meta...just was was Voldemort's 'Wawu'?).  The very epic of Gilgamesh is about a man's hopeless quest for immortality (and other things, Voldie wouldnt understand really, and evidently, neither do a lot of fans who dont seem to have read anything other than badly written modern fantasy)

And i see even the fannish meta went right over their heads ::eyeroll::  like Mrs Bough being killed by an anvil after arguing about the believability of canon pairings ("[re Ron and Hermioned]" I do feel that I have dropped heavy – hints. ANVIL-sized, actually, hints, prior to this point. ). or about fanfic forming a new mythos, in which, through various incarnations, from DE orgies to Prada suits, Voldie does obtain a sort of immortality, just not the kind he was intending.  (second pargraph of fic)

I don't care if feedback is positive, negative or so-so... but back it up! 

i'd love to how, for example,if i  succeeded or even failed at pastiche etc.   But you can't make a coherent attempt at feedback that can be of any use to the author, or to potential readers, if you criticise or praise patiche (or any other style) without having a clue about what it is or what the original work was like.  Complaining about their own ignorance as my failing doesn't tell me about my writing or how to improve; it doesnt tell readers what to expect, or how to approach the fic.  It does  tell me about their ignorance and their inability to recognise/learn... i'd have thought someone interested in a fic that incorporates a mythos or culture or literary tradition etc one was unfamiliar with would, you know, do a little googling to figure it our before revealing one's ignorance to the internet. 

Is this why they expressed that they were doubtful of anything posted to livejournal... to many educated people in the journal communities?  stick with the like minded uneducated so you can appear to be, and think you are, smart, and never have to question your ignorances or biases.... (oh how much ive learned on LJ and DW, i have to make a post about that one day, a sorta general thankyou to all the, many i dont recall names of, who educated me on so many things soon as i realised shutting my mouth and listening would take me farther in understand other people and the world.)

anyway, i'm guess i'm lucky they didnt try reading the Gertrude Stein crossover pactiche; it  most likely  would have got negative stars, lol!

example from a public domain text, though i like Gardener's better....

Urshanabi arrived at the Waters of Death.
Urshanabi said to Gilgamesh:
"Hold back, Gilgamesh, take a punting pole,
but your hand must not pass over the Waters of Death ... !
Take a second, Gilgamesh, a third, and a fourth pole,
take a fifth, Gilgamesh, a sixth, and a seventh pole,
take an eighth, Gilgamesh, a ninth, and a tenth pole,
take an eleventh, Gilgamesh, and a twelfth pole!"
In twice 60 rods Gilgamesh had used up the punting poles.
Then he loosened his waist-cloth(?) for...
Gilgamesh stripped off his garment
and held it up on the mast(!) with his arms.
Utanapishtim was gazing off into the distance,
puzzling to himself he said, wondering to himself:
"Why are 'the stone things' of the boat smashed to pieces!
And why is someone not its master sailing on it?
The one who is coming is not a man of mine, ...

I keep looking but not...
I keep looking but not ...
I keep looking..."

[lines are missing here.]

Utanapishtim said to Gilgamesh:
"Why are your cheeks emaciated, your expression desolate!
Why is your heart so wretched, your features so haggard!
Why is there such sadness deep within you!
Why do you look like one who has been traveling a long distance
so that ice and heat have seared your face!
... you roam the wilderness!"

Gilgamesh spoke to Utanapishtim saying:
"Should not my cheeks be emaciated, my expression desolate!
Should my heart not be wretched, my features not haggard!
Should there not be sadness deep within me!
Should I not look like one who has been traveling a long distance,
and should ice and heat not have seared my face!
... should I not roam the wilderness)
www.ancienttexts.org/library/mesopotamian/gilgamesh/tab10.htm

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