This year has been so depressing. Bug and I have desperately been trying to write but we've maybe done the equivalent of 1 chapter spread out over the year. My pain dr won't do anything about the meds not helping b/c my pain is getting worse because a ton of physical work has been dumped on me in the past year. Drs won't do anything about my worsening sleep problems either.
We lost two of our cats, Toby and Susan, just a few months ago. We've been having mounting problems with medical and dental issues. I have panick attacks almost every day. During the worst of them, bug tried to give me a hug and because I was rocking so hard (they were on/behind me and I was in a sort of fetal position) the movement ended up hurting their neck/back where they have spondelosis, exactly the thing I try to prevent them doing to themselves when they have a seizure. and they spend the rest of the day having to crawl everywhere because they couldn't feel their feet. Bug desperately needs to see a dentist who can work on them w/o damaging their neck by tilting/turning it the wrong way or thy''ll loose their teeth soon (their meds dry their mouth making decay/gingivitis accelerate). They also need to get rod put in their neck to stablise it from the spondelosis that started back in childhood and has been getting worse- the bones are crumbling. I need two teeth worked on too or I'll loose them, but that is much less important than her tooth and neck problems.
Whenever i look at A Bittersweet Potion or other fanfic work, or see some post about how its supposedly discontinued I end up crying. Ditto for any of my rat genetics articles. I repeatedly fuck up paying the bills, getting things in late, sending the wrong amounts to the wrong companies (like switching the figures, dyslexic). I am completely useless and if I wasn't terrified of what would happen to Bugland, and of screwing it up and ending up in a hospital i'd probably be ded already.
My grandmother is dying; it's the 20th anniversary of my dad's death and Last month we had a terrible emergancy with our Disability Service Dog Mickey and expected him to die. Mickey is named for my grandfather who also died less than a year before my father when I was in highschool. Our regular vet would allow us to pay what we could over time, but they couldn't help him and we had to go to a specialty vet- who doesn't know us and won't do that for us. Diagnosing him alone required multiple X-Rays., Ultrasounds, a Spinal tap and even a fucking MRI of his brain and spine!
The bills are already around $10,000 and will probably be double that by the time we are done, as he is on a shitload of pain meds and expensive antibiotics that he has to be on for months, plus check-up visits and more XRays and possibly another MRI to know when he is in the "clear"/"cured". I used up what little savings we had, our credit cards are maxed out, my mum's are or soon will be, and other than me tam my mum and grandmother there's no other family to go to.
We're supposed to have in-home help, but we've had help for over a month (long story, if you want to know about it, its in the link below. So I'm doing twice the physical work load I am used to and on less pain meds b/c the dr's are either too scared of the FDA or dn't believe i hurt as much as I claim, esp given my age. Ontop of that, I've been sick for the past 3 and a half weeks, despite being on antibiotics. I feel like I have mono again even though I've been told you cant have it twice... I struggle to be awake more than 6 hrs a day... struggle more so that the 6hrs are during business hours so I can get things done.
This is the PLEA:
PLEASE if you can take just a couple minutes and click some buttons and ask your friends to. You don't have to spend anything. I need to keep the page telling our dog's story well-visitted enough (if it falls under a certain # visitors, they disable it) to keep ads on it which doesn't give me alot in revenu, but every little bit counts. Make it your homepage to guarantee a hit a day? Ask friends to? That page is here: http://rodentfancy.com/pets/help-for-mic
TIME SENSITIVE!!! I know this is late, but with everything going on, and crying every time I tried to write or edit photos, i didn't get it done until now. ... There is a pet costume contest on the Pet Supplies Plus page. We usually go to the in store costume contests, but Mickey isn't allowed to go out due to the injuries! Voting ends on the night of the 31st so if you have a facebook page, PLEASE vote for our dog and ask your FB friends to vote for him. If we win, we'll get a gift certificate which will help us buy the pet food while we put all our $ towards the vet costs.
Here is the link to vote for him in the costume contest: http://bit.ly/1pQKMIs I know I fucked up getting him entered so late, but If enough people vote and enough people get their friends to vote, maybe we can at least get 3rd prize? We have to try!
There are other options on the http://rodentfancy.com/pets/help-for-mic
Thank you everyone who helps in any way, even just visiting the page for ad revenue.
"... A Christian mother is writing a ‘family friendly’ version of Harry Potter – in which gay headmaster Albus Dumbledore is actually a straight reverend.
The story ‘Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles’ is currently 8000 words long, and was written by evangelical mother Grace Ann, who took it upon herself to remove all references to witchcraft, homosexuality and liberal values.
In the new version of the story, Lord Voldemort is known for persecuting Christians, while Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon ‘mistreat’ Harry by forcing him to listen to Richard Dawkins.
It also recasts Albus Dumbledore – the gay headmaster of Hogwarts who had a romance with Gellert Grindelwald in the original novels – as ‘Reverend Dumbledore’, who is married to..." Professor Minerva McGonagall, with whom he has a daughter, Hermione Granger, who — inexplicably — has a different last name from the rest of her family....
"... Ensuing chapters also reveal Slytherin (catholic) Ron’s worship of idols, Harry’s refusal to pray to the Virgin Mary, and this iconic sorting-hat moment:
"...and then he [Harry] jumped up onto the table; and he got down on his knees; and he raised his hands to the ceiling of the Great Hall; and he bellowed, “Dear Lord, I have made my decision! I am a GRYFFINDOR HAT!”
Snape, apparently, is a Gryffindor as well. Pray we find out why in Chapter 8. "
Need a recommendation for internet provider in chicagoland area, specifically dupage county. bug's family ruined AT&T for us (after years of refusing contact, bug contacted them (after i pushed them too) out of desperation for help with a dental emergancy- they passed around the phone number and people called day and night despite her asking them not to, racking up a phone bill that was more than the initial dental cost bug asked help with >:( (and of course that was just the 1st dental visit; bug needed several ore due to an aggressive infection that was threatening a bunch of teeth, and couldn't see just any ol'dentist thru the county's program due to the way bug's medical conditions interact with the anethasia and the tilting back of the head due to crumbing vertebrae from.... gosh i wonder what. >:( So we ended up loosing the phone service we had, the internet service we had, and have creditors after us for the $500+ phone bill and the several thousand $ dental bill
Sorry I'm rambling and ranting, grrr grrr grrr. It was MY stupid idea, so it is really all my fault >:(
We Tried Comcast since my mother "loves it", but she has cable too and also always has enough $ in her bank account to just have her bills auto-deduct from it on time. For us, it is too expensive for what quality is no better than what we got for half the price with AT&T, and with less leeway and stiffer penelties for people like us who live 'hand-to-mouth' and are sometimes a couple days late due to illness or waiting to be payed (AT&T just charged us $5.95 late fee on our next bill and would disconnect if we were late a 2nd month in a row. I think that was reasonable. Comcast hiked our bill up $15 and threatened disconnection when just 1 week late (1st time). And they charge for the modem of course too- which I know I could provide myself, but when paying bills like this every month, I can't afford to buy the modem in the first place in order to get the discount on the bill... grrrr. So I have to come up with $79-something in 2 days to stay online, and another $70-something that is also due very soon, but not in 2 days (the letter didn't say when) so I need to find an alternative ASAP!
We need an ISP only- No phone, No Cable/TV, and reasonably priced!
Going to cafe's for wifi is not an option, and there aren't any open signals strong enough near our house (and I don't have a wireless modem on my desktop anyhow).(still haven't gotten around to pruning my reading/friends list, let alone actually reading it, so my apologies for ranting/dumping without at the least interacting....)
Seeing so many posts of new fandoms (some I've never even heard of....), and much less of the only one I'm involved with (if i'm still even counted as involved at this point) is depressing....
And I've so little energy these days, if I'm going to try to get back to DW/LJ & fandom, I've got to cut out some of the other communities and people I friended/followed for other things which although still interests of mine, I just don't have time/energy for, like say food/cooking or photography or animation etc.; or even disability related ones, while very relevant, also just depress me even more right now to see. Please don't be offended if I end up removing/unfriending you or leaving your community/group.
If you think I made a mistake though, please let me know. I am tired and dyslexic, and often do make errors in marking the wrong boxes. Just ask any teacher of mine who ever gave a scantron test (do they still have those, or have they gone the way of mimiographs... Im feeling old and useless just knowing I know what a mimiograph is :-( and I still haven't accomplished anything even slightly important/useful...)
As I know some of you have changed names... and as I suck at remembering names anyway.... Please comment if you think I should keep you on.... I'd appreciate knowing the following:
1. If you changed your name recently (which means, like, in the past few years (ashamed)) please let me know who I might remember you as (If you used to use a specific user icon back when, and no longer use it, I might remember that better too)
2. Do you have accounts on another journal site ( LJ and/or DW ); iif so- same or different name?
3. What do you tend to post about?
4. If applicable: your fandoms (and pairings) if relevant?
5. If you have any recommendations for me of people/places to read/friend/follow/join- esp Snarry or Meta fandom related.
If you want to comment anything else, feel free....
I only NOW remembered (by seeing the msg in my inbox here) that I had signed up for Snarry-A-Thon and never even started the damn thing. Thank goodness it wasn't an exchange. Still depressed/ashamed.
still haven't written to people I owe replies to, like a simple fucking thank you to the lawyer who helped us (free) deal with the county so we could keep out chickens/sheep, or my cousin who doing missionary work in vietnam and can't access facebook to talk to me there. Still haven't replaced the doorknob on the bathroom door, or insert countless other chores i can't remember....
I got a new pain dr at a supposedly good pain clinic. So far, the only good things about it are that 1. I got my fentynal raised from 50 to 75mcg, and 2. I got a TENs unit. Otherwise, visits usually involve being lectured about things I already know and would be do if I could do it and/or if it actually worked for me.
Cracked another tooth- half came out, half stayed in. Had to get it pulled. Have to go get another cracked tooth looked at before the same happens to it too.
Bugland has been without a working computer/laptop/smartphone for months. My mother finally offered to get them a tablet until I can rebuild a broken laptop someone gave us, soon as I find the $ to buy the parts for it. Bug's still trying to figure out how the tablet works; it has Windows 8 and isn't as intuitive as one would hope; but a better choice for bug than anything apple, or android even.
The Indian sanitary pad revolutionary
High school drop out Arunachalam Muruganantham has helped bring cheap sanitary pads to rural India, and a way for women to earn money, by inventing a simple machine to make them - but it nearly cost him his marriage.http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-2626097
ETA: We have asked for different drs and they claim to send them out but they never came. Or they came and so were very very very quiet that our dogs didn't even hear them to alert us (and they alert us to things we don't even hear at the other end of the block, so I doubt that).